‘My salary increased’: How motherhood can kickstart your career growth

At 26, I started my business. Three years later, I moved to New York City to “make it” as a writer. For the most part, I did. In the past 12 years, I’ve worked with big-name brands and publications, travelled 50+ countries, and now split my time between New York City and Australia. “Living the dream” is an understatement.

When I turned 35, the yearning to become a mother was stronger than any career calling. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid of what motherhood would do to my intrepid career.

The ubiquitous “once you have kids” or “just wait until you have kids” are framed negatively. Society just loves to look at women one-dimensionally. I view the many versions of myself cumulatively, not as a zero-sum equation. And today’s mothers are sick of that negative association.

They’re campaigning to introduce “matrescence” into the dictionary, giving word to the physical, psychological and emotional process of becoming a mother. It’s the largest neurological reorganisation of the adult human brain. Undergoing such a radical identity shift undoubtedly touches women’s careers, but not for the worse.

Parenting: a net positive for your career

Kirsty Braybon, a leading nuclear lawyer and academic at the Adelaide University was in high demand when she had her firstborn. The day her son was born, the Australian Naval Nuclear Power Safety Act for the submarine program passed, and the government called a Senate inquiry into nuclear power.

Braybon was taking calls in the parent’s lounge in the special care unit, right after her son was born at 1.9 kilograms. She had to be really open about her needs and was surprised at how accommodating people really are.

“My son has appeared with me before a Senate committee and has crawled the floors of parliament. He’s been on 44 flights, including three countries. I’ve held client meetings at kinder gyms. You just find a way to make it work,” she said.

Braybon revealed motherhood has made her braver, more confident and strategic in the work she chooses. She works three days a week but earns five times her previous public servant salary. “In our careers, we trade expertise for income. Motherhood doesn’t change that; it changes the way you use your time.”

“My career is an integral part of who I am, and I’m proud I get to show my son that. As such, I outsource the things that don’t bring value,” Braybon added. This means getting extra help at home for housework, so she can focus on bed, bath and book after work.

“I wrote assignments during nap times, studied late at night and pushed through exhaustion because I knew education was a way of keeping momentum.”

Gesica Stapleton

An MBA during mat leave

Gesica Stapleton is a mother of three and an executive product owner at CommBank. She believes women shouldn’t have to choose between having a career and family. Her career has been strengthened, not slowed, by motherhood.

After years of IVF, Stapleton found out she was pregnant on the day she had an interview for a promotion. “Motherhood and career progression arrived simultaneously, not sequentially.” She initially removed herself as a candidate, as she had internalised the belief that pregnancy made her less suitable for leadership roles.

She was hired anyway.

While on her second maternity leave, she unexpectedly fell pregnant. To ease the fear of her career being on pause again, Stapleton completed her MBA online through the Australian Institute of Business.

“I wrote assignments during nap times, studied late at night and pushed through exhaustion because I knew education was a way of keeping momentum.”

Her department had gone through a restructure in her absence, with many of her colleagues being made redundant. Stapleton was told her MBA had helped her keep her job.

”I graduated from the Australian Institute of Business and was awarded valedictorian for having the highest GPA in my cohort. Three years after returning to work, I landed my first executive manager role,” she stated.

Stapleton shared that her income has increased since becoming a mother. But it hasn’t been linear.

Juggling parenting, work and study helped Stapleton build a level of emotional endurance that no leadership course could replicate. “I can hold pressure differently now,” she said. Motherhood gave her a powerful “why” for her work.

“I wish I knew earlier that motherhood wouldn’t derail my career – it would deepen it. I wish I knew that slowing down doesn’t mean falling behind. And I wish I knew that careers don’t have to be linear to be successful.”

‘If you want something done, give it to a busy person’

Andrea Syrtash had her daughter via gestational surrogacy after five years of fertility treatments. During this time, she launched Pregnantish, the first global media platform to help others navigate infertility.

Having her daughter didn’t just strengthen her career. The global community exists because of her path to parenthood. “I have a brand with ish in the title, and I really embrace that. I’m present when I’m at home, and I’m present when I’m at work. Nothing is black or white,” she said.

Syrtash speaks at fertility conferences and runs educational events to support the community in different regions of the world. Now that her daughter is seven, she’s old enough to understand.

“When I tell her why, that I run a platform for people who really want a baby but need some help, she really understands the importance of me serving the community. Before I leave and when I come back, we always have a mamma-daughter date,” Syrtash shared.

Motherhood v career doesn’t need to be either/or. It’s a motherhood and career. Even in my IVF experience, work has been a welcome escape, not a deterrent. A place to return to. To ground myself. And, to remind myself of who I am and what I love, outside my goal of motherhood.

Amanda Smith is an Australian writer and cultural journalist. She lives in New York City.

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