‘A police officer told me my son died by suicide – then left me on my own’

A mother whose son took his own life wants the police to give more support to families who experience such deaths.

Rhian Wyn said bereaved families are often “left completely on their own”, while also having to deal with complex official procedures that follow.

Rhian was home alone with her two young daughters when a young police officer came to her home late one night in 2020.

“He told me Caio had died by suicide, and then he left,” she said.

Rhian is backing a campaign led by Mimi Conder, a widow from England, calling for police forces to provide a family support officer after a suicide.

Dyfed-Powys Police said it followed national guidance and that family liaison officers are usually assigned after a death has occurred under suspicion circumstances.

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Rhian, from Llandysul, Ceredigion, said the night she was told of her son’s death remains etched in her memory.

She said after the police officer left, she was left alone “with no help, no support”.

“I collapsed on the floor, and I remember looking up and seeing my girls at the top of the stairs listening. The officer didn’t know what to say or do, and after he left, we were completely on our own.

“No-one tells you what happens next,” she said.

Rhian also found the inquest procedure difficult.

“You have to write about your child’s life, from the day they were born to the day they died, and attend court to listen to every detail of how they died – all on your own.

“There was no-one to go with me, no one to explain anything. I had to put my grief on hold just to get through it,” she said.

Rhian is supporting Ms Conder’s campaign for Jason’s Law, which would require a trained family liaison officer (FLO) to be assigned to every family affected by suicide.

“It would help thousands of families through this horrendous process,” Rhian said.

“Someone to tell you what to expect, to guide and support you, it would make such a difference,” she said, adding it was the same “horrific loss” as if someone has died in an accident or murder.

Gwen Aaron, who works with bereavement charities, said sensitivity and clear communication are crucial when informing families of a death.

“Families are in absolute shock and often feel huge guilt after a suicide,” she said.

“The way that information is delivered is vital, and every bit of support afterwards makes a difference, especially from the police. The more open and compassionate the response, the better it helps families start to heal.”

A spokesperson for Dyfed-Powys Police said the deployment of FLOs is in accordance with national guidance.

“FLOs are typically only deployed where a death occurs under suspicious circumstances,” the force said.

“Where a death is believed to have been by suicide, the appropriate coroner will investigate.

“We appreciate the difficulty families face in navigating this process, and endeavour to ensure they are aware of charities and organisations that can provide support.”