‘Am I Failing My Child by Choosing Daycare?’ A Paediatrician’s Answer for Working Mothers

Parenting transforms us in ways we rarely anticipate. It changes routines, priorities, relationships, and often, the way we see ourselves. For many working mothers, one of the hardest transformations is learning to balance their ambitions with the expectations society places on them.

That balancing act often comes with an unwelcome companion: guilt.

The guilt of not spending enough time with a child. The guilt of returning to work. The guilt of relying on a daycare centre while pursuing a career.

But according to paediatrician Dr Sayed Mujahid Husain (MBBS, DNB), it may be time to rethink these fears altogether.

When a mother questions everything

Dr Husain recalls a common scenario from his practice. A young couple, both working professionals, had enrolled their two-and-a-half-year-old daughter in daycare.

While the arrangement helped the family manage work and caregiving responsibilities, the mother was deeply distressed. She worried that sending her daughter to daycare meant she was somehow failing as a parent. Every sniffle or minor illness reinforced her fears. What if her child fell sick too often? Should she quit her job and stay home instead?

These concerns are more common than many realise, says Dr Husain.

“Many mothers feel they have done something wrong by sending their child away from them. But that isn’t the reality.”

Childhood illnesses are part of growing up

One of the biggest worries parents have about daycare is illness. Children in group settings are naturally exposed to more germs, which can lead to frequent infections in the early years.

However, Dr Husain explains that this is a normal part of childhood development.

Just as children fall multiple times while learning to walk, they also encounter common infections as their immune systems mature. In fact, many children experience several illnesses during their first few years, whether they attend daycare or not.

The solution, he says, is not to place life on hold out of fear.

Parents cannot watch over their children every minute of every day, nor should they have to give up their aspirations because of challenges that are a natural part of growing up.

Raising children is a shared journey

Dr Husain believes society must move beyond the idea that childcare is solely a mother’s responsibility.

Parenting works best when it is shared. When partners support one another and contribute equally, children grow up in healthier, more balanced environments.

His message to parents is simple: life should continue. Mothers and fathers deserve the freedom to pursue their dreams, build meaningful careers, and enjoy fulfilling lives without carrying unnecessary guilt.

After all, children do not just learn from the time spent with their parents — they also learn from watching them grow, persevere, and thrive. And perhaps that is one of the most valuable lessons a parent can pass on.

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