Congress leader Sonia Gandhi has offered a glimpse into the early relationship between her brother-in-law Sanjay Gandhi and Maneka Gandhi, recalling how their romance developed, the tensions that later surfaced within the family and Indira Gandhi’s growing concerns about Maneka’s influence. In her memoir, Belonging: A Journey of Love, Sonia describes Maneka as lively and talkative when she first joined the household, but says relations gradually became strained. She also recounts Indira’s remark that Maneka was already “growing wings” during the Emergency, as Sanjay’s political influence expanded within the family.
A Changing Household
Sanjay met Maneka Anand, an Army officer’s daughter, at a school friend’s engagement in late 1973. Ten years his junior, she studied at Lady Shri Ram College and had modelled.
Within days, Sanjay told Indira he was considering marriage. His mother was surprised, as he had introduced female friends to the family before but never raised marriage so quickly. Indira advised him to wait: Maneka was under 18. They became engaged and married in September 1974.
Sonia remembers Maneka as “lively and talkative”, and says she enjoyed listening to her stories. Priyanka visited Maneka’s room to hear them. But tensions emerged.
Sonia writes that she was called “bahurani” and Maneka “chhoti bahurani”. She regarded them as equal daughters of the family, but thought Maneka may have found the distinction insulting. Sonia says she sometimes kept quiet to preserve peace, but answered back when necessary.
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Indira’s Concern
Sonia recalls arguments between the couple, involving shouting and abusive language from Maneka, even in front of Indira. She suggests the disciplined household may have felt restrictive to the young woman. Sanjay was busy with his car project, Indira with work, and Rajiv with flying.
Maneka later accompanied Sanjay to political events and launched the magazine Surya, with her mother as director and Maneka as editor.
During the Emergency, Congress leaders at the time were unhappy with Sanjay’s conduct and arbitrary decisions. Sonia writes that Indira was concerned Maneka encouraged his actions and sometimes took part. She recalls Indira telling Cabinet Secretary PN Dhar that Maneka was already “growing wings”.
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