Dawn French addresses the taboo subject of suicide in her new book, following her own personal tragedy after the death of her father
Dawn French has opened up about the lasting impact of her father’s death by suicide when she was just 19. The 68-year-old’s dad died in 1977 aged 45 when she was just 19 years old. In her new book Enough, Dawn French addresses ageing, mortality and the taboo subject of suicide, reflecting on how it has occasionally crossed her mind.
“I’ve faced a lot of my thoughts and fears about it,” she told The Times. Reflecting on her father’s death, she added: “Suicide lives in my brain in a way it might not for somebody who hasn’t experienced it so closely.
“And as I’ve got older, I want to talk about the big things. I set out to write something I’m a bit afraid to admit; that getting older is difficult, end of life is difficult, suicide is difficult.”
The actress said that while thoughts of suicide have crossed her mind as she has got older, she stresses: “I don’t think I would ever make this choice,” though admitted she can understand why some people do.
The Vicar of Dibley star said her father “lived his whole life with this suicidal ideation and with depression”, adding that while she does not know all the details, she knew he had previously attempted to take his own life while training at RAF Halton.
The ex-wife of Lenny Henry suffered further heartbreak in 2012 when her mother, Roma, died shortly after being diagnosed with lung cancer.
“My mum’s gone now, but my brother, Gary, and I always talk about it. Just to check in on each other and to make it OK,” she said.
Following her mother’s death, Dawn admitted it became harder not to think about mortality.
She previously told us: “But I would hope to be totally optimistic about my own death. That’s why I am grateful for the example shown to me by my mum.
“I remember one day coming back from a hospital test which was not good and mum said, ‘Well it’s a win-win situation’.
“I replied, ‘And how do you see that?’ and she said, ‘Well, either I stay here with you guys or I go and see your dad’. And that is what she 100% believed.”
Despite her grief, Dawn says she still has “too much love for” those around her and continues to find happiness in everyday life with the help of her career, loved ones and home life.
If you need to talk and don’t know where to turn to, the Samaritans operate a free helpline open 24/7 on 116 123. Alternatively you can email jo@samaritans.org or visit the website to find your local branch.
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