In her book ‘The Art of Being Fabulous’ published by Penguin, Shalini Passi moves beyond surface glamour to explore intention, discipline and self-awareness. In this interview, she reflects on building an inner standard, setting boundaries, and choosing substance over noise in a world driven by visibility.
You call fabulousness an internal standard. What does that look like on an ordinary day?
Fabulousness, to me, is not an event—it’s a frequency. On an ordinary day, it looks like waking up with clarity, choosing what deserves my attention, and moving through the day with intention. It’s how I sit with my thoughts, how I speak to people, how I respond rather than react. It’s discipline in small things—what I eat, what I read, what I allow into my mental space. There may be no audience and no performance, but there is always a presence. That is the real luxury.
How do you balance visibility with protecting your energy in a culture that rewards constant performance?
Visibility is a tool, not a lifestyle. I use it when it serves a purpose—whether it’s amplifying art, ideas, or impact—but I don’t let it consume me. Protecting my energy requires boundaries, and boundaries are a form of self-respect. I am very selective about where I show up, both physically and digitally. Not every invitation deserves a yes, and not every moment needs to be shared. Silence, privacy, and withdrawal are not absences—they are investments. Presence is powerful only when it is intentional.
What is one “discipline” you follow that most people would find surprisingly non-glamorous? Consistency. It sounds simple, but it’s deeply unglamorous. Showing up for yourself every day—whether it’s maintaining your health, your thoughts, or your commitments—without applause or validation. There are no filters for discipline. It’s the quiet repetition of doing what is necessary, not what is exciting. That is where real power is built.
Has reality TV changed how seriously people take your ideas on art, power, and philanthropy?
Reality TV changes visibility, not substance. Some people may initially view you through the lens of entertainment, but over time, what you stand for speaks louder than where you’ve appeared. I don’t dilute my ideas to fit perceptions. If anything, it has given me a broader audience—and with that comes the responsibility to be even more precise, more grounded. Depth cannot be faked. Those who are looking for it will always find it.
In an age of excess, what have you consciously chosen to say no to?
Noise. Excess today is not just material—it’s informational, emotional, and social. I’ve learned to say no to anything that disrupts my clarity or dilutes my intention. That includes unnecessary social obligations, superficial conversations, and even certain opportunities that don’t align with my values. Saying no is not deprivation; it is refinement. It creates space for what truly matters.
How do you ensure your philanthropy remains meaningful rather than performative?
By keeping the focus on the work, not the visibility around it. Philanthropy should not be an extension of one’s image—it should be an extension of one’s values. I stay deeply involved, I listen, and I measure impact beyond optics. It’s important to support ideas and initiatives that may not be immediately visible or commercially appealing but have long-term significance. Meaningful work often happens quietly. If it changes lives, it doesn’t need to announce itself.
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