DJ Tom Zanetti lost his girlfriend in a car crash on the same stretch of motorway where his grandad and uncle both died a year before as he has opened up about his heartbreaking life
Tom Zanetti has put his heart and soul into his new party restaurant venue(Image: tomzanettitz/Instagram)
Superstar DJ Tom Zanetti has tackled enough in his life to shake-off his sous chef leaving him in the lurch days before the opening of his new Marbella party restaurant.
The 36-year-old – a brilliantly self-described “idiot from Leeds who just can’t stop” – is celebrating a fantastic first fortnight in his new venture after a traumatic few years which has seen him bounce back from the brink of bankruptcy. If anyone could write a book on dealing with trauma and flicking the switch on the powers of recovery, it’s the platinum-selling musician.
After becoming a dad at the age of 16, his world was rocked when his girlfriend died in the horror car crash on the same stretch of road that his uncle and grandad were both killed on just a year before.
The hard-partying music star, whose tunes have been streamed more than half a billion times across the world, became addicted to sleeping pills, and before that in 2017 he was pulled from the wreckage of a £280,000 Ferrari when the super car left the road and flipped onto its roof after he slipped on some oil.
Tom, who says his life was changed by counseling, sat down with us to discuss how he juggled grief with being a young dad and how his life experiences have helped him deal with the strains and stresses of launching Zanettis Marbella, which opened late last month.
“I’ve had a rough few years, in a nutshell it’s been horrible – really horrible,” he said. “I actually first came to Marbella to de-stress, would you believe. I needed to sort myself out, have some time off and get back on track because it has been a really difficult time, financially and mentally.
“While I was out there I was given this opportunity, six or seven weeks ago. I knew I needed to chill out but I thought ‘oh f**k it I’ll take it on’. So I did, I knew I had to throw myself into it.
“In seven weeks, I’ve had to refurbish a restaurant, organise all the staff, sort the menu, the napkins you name it – and it’s all in a different country!
“It’s a vibrant dinner and dancing experience, I’m going to do a set over the weekend. You can order your steak at 11pm and have an incredible time! We sold out the three-day launch weekend without a menu! I’m really pleased that there’s such a great vibe.
“We are bringing the positive energy, which is what I always try to do. I’ve not been to sleep since 2009!”
His passion is fuelled by fatherhood, and after becoming a dad as a teenager his young-football star son is not exactly like his old man.
Deaconn, 19, has the world in front of him as he breaks through at League Two team Chesterfield, and he doesn’t need to worry about his lad having wild nights out as he looks to make it big in the pro game.
“He’s all about fitness, he skips clubbing with his friends so we’re similar in some ways but not others,” he added. “My dad was a DJ in the 90s. He was a bit of a boy, he went to jail, and he is an absolute character. He’s written a book and it is unbelievable.
“I got kicked out of school when I was 14. I wasn’t a bad kid, I just didn’t really conform. I was in the top set for everything. I was quite intelligent, but I just ended up getting kicked out and then I was then suddenly a single parent at 16.
“A few years later I had met someone amazing, I’d actually moved her in after a few weeks, and we were a little family. Life was going really well.”
Then Tom’s world was shattered when his girlfriend Lizzie died after falling asleep at the wheel of her car. “My girlfriend was incredible,” he added. “We met when I was 18, she died in almost the exact part of the motorway where my grandad and my uncle also passed away a year before.
“They were on their way to work and a lorry came to the other side of the road. We’ve been through a lot as a family, trials, tests and trauma, the lot.
“Losing Lizzie, it was tough. Having a young son who loved her, wow. Whenever I needed to cry I walked out of the room as I just couldn’t let him see me upset. It took a long while, of course. Keep trying. keep shining.”
Tom continued to work and switched his music career to a stint on TV when he appeared on Celebs Go Dating in 2021. He broke some rules and met someone special, and after catching the eye of Made in Chelsea’s Sophie Hermann he even landed a part in the west London show.
“I’d never seen the programme [ Celebs Go Dating] before,” he said. “They said, look, you’ll be in a mansion for six weeks and dating different girls every day and you’ll get paid. So I thought, right, I’m up for that!
“I had such a good experience with no phones allowed in there, meeting people I didn’t know, who you’d never met before, so it would be all the basic conversation and relationship. I think I was the only person who got 10 out of 10 for every day on the show!
“I come out of the show not only with a girlfriend but a number one single. I got so much interest from other TV shows but I wanted to get back into touring.
“Meeting Sophie was fantastic. It wasn’t to be in the end but we had a great time together. I managed to pull the unpullable girl! You’re not supposed to get with the other celebs, that’s not the point of the show, but we broke the code. It was a crazy experience.”
But by that point he was hooked on sleeping pills – and it was having a huge impact on his life.
“I went through a period when I was sleeping one day in two,” he went on. ”But the best decision I ever made was to get help and see a counsellor. I can’t stress that enough to anyone who is struggling.
“When things seem dark, and it sounds cliche, but just keep going step by step until you see the light again.
“So I’ll always think to myself when I’m down now, I know it’s going to get better. Time heals, but there’s been times in my life where I thought I don’t want to be here anymore. I actually don’t want to, but as time will keep spinning, things change. You start to feel differently.”
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